Public knowledge/ private performances.

On 10 October, 2012 · 6 Comments · In Art

At first I wanted to draw empowering pictures but then I realised they were empty, almost lies. I’ve been avoiding my real self my whole life because I thought I wasn’t suitable. Confession is familiar, it keeps me in the dark; now I feel like it’s time to live transparently so I am drawing my secrets as if they were common knowledge.

Instagram of a pad with watercolour splotches and the text “Why would anyone choose to be ugly? Who gets to choose to be ugly?”


Watercolour and ink drawing of a fat white lady (me) in a ratty black bra and grey undies looking unsympathetic. Text says “Not for you.”


Watercolour and ink drawing of a fat white lady (me) wearing a green polka dot dress and sweating profusely, fanning herself with a notebook and wiping sweat from her brow.


Sometimes I’m astounded and depressed that we still have to talk about the male gaze.

Related posts:

  1. Resolving things.
  2. Four things I did in recent weeks.
  3. Fat Cows and Strangers.
  4. Ladies, monsters and morality.
  5. My art needs your walls and vice versa.
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  • Kat from Team Kitten

    Hey Natalie, i love your new drawings and watercolour – great work! Your work only just popped up on my facebook page, i had been subscribed for ages but not seen any of your older posts, until now. I’m glad it popped up so i could see your new work! xo Kat

  • http://twitter.com/sweetleighsewn vanessa leigh

    Amazing work. I love your vulnerability and talent. Amazing work.

  • Damana

    I think that no matter how we look, there are parts of ourselves we dislike. We often don’t see how lovely we are to the people who care about us. Reproaching ourselves once in a while can make us lift our game but please don’t let it become self-loathing.

    From what I see of you, you are a rare and wonderful soul. I’ve followed you for years. Thank you for being you. Stay strong and beautiful.

  • http://www.musingsfromthesoapbox.blogspot.com Veronica

    I’ve liked your work for a long while, and many of your drawings make me smile, but the one of you in grey underwear is the first one I’ve wanted to buy. Let me know if you decide to sell it, or something similar?

  • MKN

    I think you are doing great work. every person is beautiful on their way and nobody chooses to be ugly. life would have been easier if some people could understand that. we are what we are and most of the times we can not change it no matter how we try.

  • http://www.facebook.com/crumbling.crayons Neem Maness

    I really like your idea of embracing ugliness! I think embracing ugliness can be just as powerful an act of self-love as thinking everything about yourself is beautiful. As women, we are taught that we are valuable because other people think we’re beautiful. Saying f*** that noise, I can be as ugly as I want and still be valuable is such a liberating experience. I have often chosen to purposefully make myself look uglier because it gave me pleasure to just embrace something so taboo. being ugly DOES NOT equal low self-esteem. You, your writing, and your work are super rad for exploring ugliness as a legitimate way of existing.

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