I want to take a moment to appreciate and respect some of the fantastic people who have influenced me in the arena of body acceptance. When I started using the internet, it was more than just a mass of information ping-ponging from server to server, it was a means of finding and communicating [...]]]>

I want to take a moment to appreciate and respect some of the fantastic people who have influenced me in the arena of body acceptance. When I started using the internet, it was more than just a mass of information ping-ponging from server to server, it was a means of finding and communicating with people who were like minded, and because I have always felt like the odd one out it was really important to me that I have access to the internet. From a young age I was interested in social justice and human rights, but it felt like all the people in my “real life” thought I was crazy, or a bleeding heart liberal (which ever is worse?!)

I’ve said before that identity and styling always intrigued me, and while I have struggled with body image and identity I never really hated myself. I knew my struggle was against societal conditioning, not me, so when I came across fat positive people in the late 90s and early 00s, it was an amazing feeling knowing that I could plug into these networks and NOT be thought of as awful just because I was fat.

A lot of the role models I list are from the last five years, because I’m sad to say that I have lost contact with (and forgotten names of, sadly) a number of friends and admired people that I knew in the earlier days. If any of them stumble across this entry, I just want to thank them for their support, encouragement and enlightenment.

Beth Ditto

It goes without saying, but Ms. Ditto is a phenomenon. It’s not often that I can rave about a celebrity and admire pretty much all of their persona, their art, what they say, and how they carry themselves but Beth Ditto ticks all the boxes for me. Plenty of people have said that they can’t stand how she strips down to few clothes during performances, or that she behaves in a generally unladylike manner, but they are revolutionary acts she carries out in a world that pooh-poohs women for not being whatever enough. I like it. Screw being ladylike, own yourself!

Kelli Jean Drinkwater

I don’t know much about Kelli Jean, but I know that she rocks. She’s a performer, actor, model, film maker and an all-around champion of fance. Currently she’s in Sydney causing havok, so if you see any events she’s associated with CHECK THEM OUT AND REPORT BACK TO ME!

Marianne Kirby

Participating in the fatshionista Live Journal community was hugely challenging for me, but it has also been incredibly rewarding. I am pretty sure I butted heads with Marianne in her moderating role a few times in the early years, but after I read the book she wrote with Kate Harding (Screw Inner Beauty in Australia, Notes from the Fat-o-Sphere in the US) it dawned on me that some of the things I was clinging to, that I would defend tooth and nail, were hurting me and holding me back. Like pretty much everyone in western society, I would judge other people and validate myself by putting others down. My defensiveness was a pretty natural reaction to being challenged on this, but I’m glad Marianne challenged me. I am a happier person within myself for it.

Lesley Kinzel

Lesley is another moderator of the fatshionista LJ community, but also runs fatshionista.com. Even when I was a complete defensive twat Lesley would respond with warmth, humour and compassion and she really did inspire more of that sort of thing in me. I was so honoured when we started talking via Twitter, and she even put my blog on the fatshionista.com blogroll. Pretty daggy, I know, but that’s the kind of honesty Lesley inspires. The Boston Globe is even backing up my recommendation, with a huge article on the fantastic things this woman has done for Fat Acceptance on the internet. Go read it!

Thank you for being unashamedly you, and thank you for showing me that it’s ok to be unashamedly me.

This morning Michael Jackson died, and I have been running the gamut of emotions remembering my childhood as an avid MJ fan. I think it was when I was about four that I became fixated on him, and I remember that my uncle Pete had brought up his Thriller album on a visit from [...]]]>

This morning Michael Jackson died, and I have been running the gamut of emotions remembering my childhood as an avid MJ fan. I think it was when I was about four that I became fixated on him, and I remember that my uncle Pete had brought up his Thriller album on a visit from Melbourne for me to listen to. Michael then became my imaginary friend – even though I had two baby sisters, I was a very solitary child and would play by myself for hours and Michael would keep me company. When my sister Amanda was born, it meant that all three girls took up the back seats in the car, and Mum tells me (with a giggle) that I used to panic and protest that they were sitting on Michael and hurting him.

I would watch for the “We Are The World” clip to come on Rage on the weekends, anxiously anticipating when Michael would come in for the first chorus. (That song had ALL of my heroes, basically!) Michael used to say and do a lot of things to encourage peace and love, and I honestly felt that all people should have the same aims (oh naivety!)

When the Dangerous album came out I was about 10 years old and Mum and Dad bought us the cassette album, which we’d play in my awesome pink cassette player. We’d blast it in the garage and sing and dance with our neighbours until the very end of the album. Cyndi Lauper’s She’s So Unusual would typically follow.

By 1993 the sexual abuse accusations came out; I was 12 and becoming more and more confused about my childhood hero and former imaginary friend. I was around the same age as Jordan Chandler, so it was only natural that I had some degree of empathy with him. The media went crazy, the magazines my mother frequently bought started calling him Wacko Jacko (to be fair his behaviour did become quite erratic) so my love affair with him ended quite abruptly. I felt embarrassed and betrayed.

This morning my Mum called and Nick answered the phone. Mum arranged a BBQ for Sunday night, and then told Nick that Michael Jackson was rumoured to be dead. I was in a state of disbelief. Rumours were flying on Twitter and Facebook, and as the hour swung around and Michael’s death was confirmed, I put on Thriller and relived my childhood memories. They were good memories. Happy memories. Michael Jackson taught me to dance and sing, two things I still adore as an adult. He was my role model and I think a lot of my creative aptitude was encouraged in those years, by him and my family.

Vale Michael Jackson. My hero.