Let me do you a favour.

I wore something really cute the other day (and in days before that) but I have been so busy (oh just casually buying a HOUSE! and doing other things) that I’ve not had a moment to grab Nick to take photos. The other curious thing is that even though we live with Nick’s Mum at the moment and have a large yard at our disposal, I feel quite self conscious taking outfit photos in front of my Mother-in-law. There are bloggers who march out into the world with a tripod and remote control and snap photos of themselves in public with no problem, but having to explain to my MIL why I take photos of myself seems a very awkward and embarrassing thing. I can’t imagine trying to explain posing in front of a tripod on a busy sidewalk to a curious stranger!

It seems all wrapped up in these thoughts and feelings I’m having about vanity, or Improper and Unladylike Vulgar Displays of Conceit. From an early age my socialisation imbued in me the importance of being modest and even self-deprecating, because a girl child who was self absorbed and knew she was hot shit was a terrible threat. But that’s crap, right? For most of my life I’ve traded on jokes about my perceived shortcomings as a way of perhaps reducing my threat, signifying to others that I’m cool and approachable; but upon reflection my Disparage Fests also acted as self defence, so I could take the first jab at myself before anyone else. As a result, I’m a super effective bully of my own ego, esteem and worth.

Plenty of people make mention of bloggers who post 10 photos of themselves in the same pose, and I’ve tried not to do that because I haven’t wanted to come across as self absorbed (or consume much of your valuable bandwidth) but today I couldn’t figure out which of these outfit photos to post, so I may as well post all of them because I’m sick of feeling defensive and trying to practice modesty. It’s over!

A photo of my face, with large gold hoops dangling from the tunnels in my ear lobes.
An outfit photo of me, fat and pale skinned with short white hair, wearing an oversized sheer white and black polka dot blouse over a black maxi skirt, posing with my hands on my hips.
A photo of me with my arms stretched out so you can see the awesome sheer span of my oversized blouse.
A photo of me with my arms up in the air.
A photo of me with one arm behind my head, in a half arsed cheesecake pose.
A photo of me with, yep, my arms up in the air milking the fabulous oversized sheerness of my blouse.

This top is now my best and favourite. I’m very chuffed I could scrape together the dollars to buy it because finding a sheer, button up and collared blouse has been a dispiriting experience. I also bought a black sheer blouse with white and black polka dots on the back because Domino Dollhouse are serving up the sheer like no other plus size shop!

Blouse: Domino Dollhouse
Skirt: Made by me
Shoes: Spendless
Hoop earrings: Evans

15 comments

  1. Hey Nat you look FAB!!!!
    Theres nothing wrong with having a good dose of self confidence and knowing who you are/what your about.
    You have all of that in abundance and it comes across really well-not ecotastic at all!
    Love the fact that you made your own skirt-your such an inspiration:)))
    Im off to read the rest of your blog now-all day!!!
    LUV YA HEAPS MISS THING
    Issyx

    http://www.hookytime.blogspot.com

  2. I love this post. I understand entirely the idea of self deprecating as a form of self defence. I used to do that a LOT and still find myself doing it every now and again. It is easier to take the first shot at myself, than let someone else do it because it’s always felt less painful and a bit safer that way. I desperately try not to do this anymore. It can be hard.
    I never thought of it as meaning I am a bully of my own ego though. What a really honest and impactful way of looking at it.
    I love all the photos by the way – particularly the last two. You look like you’re laughing and enjoying yourself and I love that. xxx.

  3. You hit the nail on the head. I get so embarrased posing for shots but slowly getting there with it. Nothing wrong with a bit of confidence and knowing that you look fabulous. :)

  4. I’m exactly the same with my mother in law, which is a shame because she has an amazing garden. Looking fabulous as ever, by the way!

  5. I was gonna start this by saying…I dont post comments much (at all)…and then I thought…gee thats just what you’re talking about…self depreciating!

    I wanted to thank you for being you. Sometimes I love what you say / sometimes it make me mad – but every single time it makes me think…so thank you.I wonder how differently I would have felt growing up in the 80’s if I had access to just one woman (yes – just one) – who was fat and proud and loud, but there was no-one – not personally and not in the media that I could relate to..so thank you again for being you…I will probly go back to being quiet on your blog, but I hope you always know how much you say to me xxx

  6. I’m glad you posted all those pics cos I’ve been looking at that shirt on their site but couldn’t get a clear idea of what it’d look like on.  Fantastic!  

  7. You look fab! You totally rock the sheer. I feel the same way about taking pictures, when I was living with my ex’s parents, I found it so hard, I’d often try to do it when they went out! 

  8. I just screamed out loud–do my eyes deceive me or do you have an Interrobang tattoo?! I’m so happy right now. :) I have copy editing punctuation symbols tattooed on my left arm and quotation marks on my collarbone. I just found your blog and love your style, with refusing to devalue your own awesomeness AND with the proper deployment of a polka dot. I love a good polka dot.

  9. Hello hello, 

    I stumbled onto your blog from a long winded journey that started with me in Reddit’s r/bodyacceptance and ended with my day a whole lot brighter. The phrase ‘so happy I could almost be  in a tampon add’ made me squirt seltzer out of my nose. You are hilarious, and have inspired me to go sheer this spring – that’s great look and you are a funny and fantastic blogger!

    All the best, y’hear.

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