I wore something really cute the other day (and in days before that) but I have been so busy (oh just casually buying a HOUSE! and doing other things) that I’ve not had a moment to grab Nick to take photos. The other curious thing is that even though we live with Nick’s Mum at the moment and have a large yard at our disposal, I feel quite self conscious taking outfit photos in front of my Mother-in-law. There are bloggers who march out into the world with a tripod and remote control and snap photos of themselves in public with no problem, but having to explain to my MIL why I take photos of myself seems a very awkward and embarrassing thing. I can’t imagine trying to explain posing in front of a tripod on a busy sidewalk to a curious stranger!
It seems all wrapped up in these thoughts and feelings I’m having about vanity, or Improper and Unladylike Vulgar Displays of Conceit. From an early age my socialisation imbued in me the importance of being modest and even self-deprecating, because a girl child who was self absorbed and knew she was hot shit was a terrible threat. But that’s crap, right? For most of my life I’ve traded on jokes about my perceived shortcomings as a way of perhaps reducing my threat, signifying to others that I’m cool and approachable; but upon reflection my Disparage Fests also acted as self defence, so I could take the first jab at myself before anyone else. As a result, I’m a super effective bully of my own ego, esteem and worth.
Plenty of people make mention of bloggers who post 10 photos of themselves in the same pose, and I’ve tried not to do that because I haven’t wanted to come across as self absorbed (or consume much of your valuable bandwidth) but today I couldn’t figure out which of these outfit photos to post, so I may as well post all of them because I’m sick of feeling defensive and trying to practice modesty. It’s over!
This top is now my best and favourite. I’m very chuffed I could scrape together the dollars to buy it because finding a sheer, button up and collared blouse has been a dispiriting experience. I also bought a black sheer blouse with white and black polka dots on the back because Domino Dollhouse are serving up the sheer like no other plus size shop!